Don't let attraction trick you into settling.
Angela Jean
When you focus on how much you like someone based on your attraction level to them, you can often miss the fact that they don't make you feel that great. Don't confuse the way YOU FEEL with how they make you feel. Meaning, you get butterflies when you see them because you are attracted to them, but you never know exactly where you stand. You get mixed signals, vagueness, misaligned desires. Don't let attraction trick you into settling.
You have to pay attention to how you feel when you leave, when you are together, the times in between. Do they make you feel HAPPY & PEACEFUL or do you have anxiety and always feel like you are waiting for them to reach out.
Many of us fill in the blanks after a first few dates if the man is visually stimulating. Looks are the first thing to make you feel something but also the first to fade. Remember that.
Before yo can pick a partner, you hav to learn yourself so that you know what you need long term. Pay attention to what has ended your relationships. Take inventory on your dating patterns. For me personally I have always picked partners with my eyes, and convinced myself to settle for the other missing pieces. This was great for a while, but I always found myself mentally bored after a certain amount of time. I would leave the relationship and move on. I kept picking the same type of guy, hot, fun, but mentally boring. Once you learn your patterns of what does not work, you have to challenge yourself to date outside the box. It is a pattern, so like any bad habit, it takes focus and commitment to break.
This may or may not apply to you, but try to feel your way through dating. Pick from a place of sensation that feels good. Don'r concern yourself with what people say about your choices. When you do that you are allowing them to place their filter on your life. This is a problem that keeps most people single and searching.
Conclusion
Decide what you need and want in a partner and do not pivot.
If you stay the course you will get to your destination quicker..
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